I got MY invitation to the Republican National Con

[LadyWinterWolf]

did you?





Sent to me by a Republican (honestly!) friend:



REPUBLICAN NATIONAL CONVENTION SCHEDULE


6:00 PM

Opening Prayer, led by the Rev. Jerry Falwell

6:30 PM

Pledge of Allegiance


6:35 PM

Burning of Bill of Rights (excluding 2nd amendment)


6:45 PM

Salute to the Coalition of the Willing


6:46 PM

Seminar #1: "Getting Your Kid A Military Deferment"


7:30 PM

First Presidential Beer Bong


7:35 PM

Serve Freedom Fries


7:40 PM

EPA Address #1: "Mercury, It's What's for Dinner"


8:00 PM

Vote on which country to invade next


8:10 PM

Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh


8:15 PM

John Ashcroft Lecture: "The Homos Are After Your Children"


8:30 PM

Roundtable discussion on reproductive rights (MEN only)


8:50 PM

Seminar #2: "Corporations: The Government of the Future"


9:00 PM

Condi Rice sings "I Can't Help Lovin' Dat Man"


9:05 PM

Second Presidential Beer Bong


9:10 PM

EPA Address #2: "Trees: The Real Cause of Forest Fires"


9:30 PM

Break for secret meetings


10:00 PM

Second prayer, led by Cal Thomas


10:15 PM

Lecture by Karl Rove: "Doublespeak Made Easy"


10:30 PM

Rumsfeld demonstration: How to squint and talk macho


10:35 PM

Bush demonstration of trademark deer in headlights stare


10:40 PM

Ashcroft demonstrates new mandatory Kevlar chastity belt

10:45 PM

Clarence Thomas reads list of Black Republicans


10:46 PM

Third Presidential Beer Bong


10:50 PM

Seminar #3: "Education: A Drain on Our Nation's Economy"


11:10 PM

Hilary Clinton Piñata


11:20 PM

Second Ashcroft Lecture: "Evolutionists: The Dangerous New Cult"


11:30 PM

Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh again


11:35 PM

Blame Clinton


11:40 PM

Laura serves milk and cookies


11:50 PM

Closing Prayer, led by Jesus Himself


12:00 PM

Nomination of George W. Bush as Holy Supreme Planetary Overlord

[Hussar]

Heh. Funny. ;D

[Regrix]

Most amusing..

though..

Evolutionists from what I have noticed subscribe to the big bang theory for how the universe was created.

For those that don't know it.. Supposedly there was this super-massive Atom that basically was too big to support it's own mass and detonated spewing forth the matter of the cosmos which then coalesced into stars and planets and so on and so forth.

Just one problem here.. Atoms don't self create.. Where did this one come from?

And you forgot the mention of the meeting on the top ten reasons why Gay Marriage is against Everything that is good and decent.


Which brings up another point.. every law we have in America is Null and Void.. now bear with me..

We supposedly have a division of church and state, well every law we have in in some way based on the 10 commandments.

Sorry America, can't have your cake and eat it too. Now then.. Back to the Gay Marriage thing as an example..

Mass has said "We'll let you marry" though our idiot govenor was and still is trying to overturn it. Problem is, it's not his place to do so.

Marriage was a church affair.. generally speaking.. the best he could do is say that Justice of the peace couldn't do it. The Church on the other hand is not subject to his authority.

Which also reminds me the Pope and the council of Arch Bishops should sit down and shut up.. until they clean up their own house with the child abuse scandals and all they really don't have any room to manuver in telling us what is moral and what isn't.

Umm.. sorry bout the rant..

[/rant]

[Merkuri]

Regrix said:

For those that don't know it.. Supposedly there was this super-massive Atom that basically was too big to support it's own mass and detonated spewing forth the matter of the cosmos which then coalesced into stars and planets and so on and so forth.

Just one problem here.. Atoms don't self create.. Where did this one come from?

Evolutionists (or big-bang theorists) are not all atheists. Some of them are, but some are "good Christians." A common argument is that god still made the world in 6 days, just that a "day" wasn't a 24 hour period, but more like an age. And the big bang is a "singularity" in that we can't ever concievably see past it. It's not neccesarily the beginning of everything, just the beginning of everything as we know it. One theory (though it's been slowly falling out of favor) is that the universe regularly explodes, then collapses back into a superatom, then explodes again. And nobody said god didn't create that superatom on the first "day".

Which brings up another point.. every law we have in America is Null and Void.. now bear with me..

We supposedly have a division of church and state, well every law we have in in some way based on the 10 commandments.

So? It's not directly influenced by Christianity (or Judaism or Islam or Bhuddism, etc.) and that's all that really matters. The majority of our country is Judeo-Christian so our country's morality (which we base our laws on) is based on the Judeo-Christian morality. The important thing is that we do not have a national religion the way England did at the time America rebelled. Our founding fathers were mostly Deists, not Christians, and were persecuted as such. The "separation of church and state" clause was just to prevent that sort of thing. It's impossible to make laws that aren't based on some type of morality, and it's pretty impossible to find a morality that isn't based on some religion.

[Hussar]

For those that don't know it.. Supposedly there was this super-massive Atom that basically was too big to support it's own mass and detonated spewing forth the matter of the cosmos which then coalesced into stars and planets and so on and so forth.

Just one problem here.. Atoms don't self create.. Where did this one come from?

Actually, there's an interesting paper in Scientific American this month about this. In it, it discusses the energy of a vacuum. Bear with me, I'm not a scientist, so this is how I understand it.

In a total vacuum, nothing exists. However, there is a potential for matter to exist in that space. (I'm not entirely sure how, go ask the eggheads, they can explain it better than me) Essentially, particles and their anti-particles are spontaneously being created all the time because of this potential. It all has to do with bubble universes and string theory which I don't pretend to be an expert on. Anyway, this goes a long way to explaining the origins of the universe.

[LadyWinterWolf]

Geez guys, this was supposed to make you laugh, not have you turn it into a serious debate....we have enough of those going on in the Wyrm's Den.